Friday, January 18, 2013


I seem to have a firm belief that a bad night can be solved with a good breakfast. I don't know where this belief came from or how long I've had it but this morning I decided that it was so.

I had a bad night. I wound up replacing sleep with Cabin Pressure and How I Met Your Mother. And some hurried mouthfuls of cold macaroni and cheese in the dark kitchen at 6 AM and a small bag of mini jaw breakers in my nightstand. So around nine o'clock I decided that what I really needed was a good breakfast and set about to making one.

The kitchen was where the trouble started the night before. I had bitten off most of my nail polish the night before and my fingers were cracked and raw and stinging. My left thumb required band-aids. But I shouldered on and came up with two scrambled eggs with cheddar cheese, tea, orange juice, water, and a tortilla. I felt that bread would make me sad.

I ate this while reading This Side of Paradise and part-way through my plate my older sister had joined me in silence with a book of her own. The watery winter sun was just glancing through the window and the snow on the ground reflected some of the light back. A but of tiny snowflakes, more like ice crystals, could occasionally be seen when caught in a ray. This stirred in me my latent desire for a proper room in which to take breakfast.

Breakfast rooms remind me of spring, and silent mornings where I am alone and wake up willingly, and the works of Kate Chopin which, despite all of the pigeons and other strange happenings from my AP Lit class, I will begrudgingly admit I enjoyed. I know that if when I have a place of my own I have an honest-to-God breakfast room, I will be doing all right by my adolescent self.

Wednesday, January 2, 2013


Today was very nice. I woke up at 1330 and didn't get downstairs until 1530. Then I ate a bunch of cookies with my mom, Billy, and Sarah. I read the Fellowship of the Rings and ate beef barley soup with my mom, Billy, and Linda. Then Elana came and we went to trivia night.

Wednesday is trivia night. I had been hearing tales of it from my friends for over two years now. But I had never gone. An invitation was never extended to me until I was in Aaron's kitchen last night and Will asked if I wanted to come. I did. Elana and I discussed dwarves and weird Korean shows on the ride over to the bar and grill. We parked across the street and leaped majestically through mounds of snow to leave the parking lot. There we found Mary, Colleen, Brad, Tori, Josh, and Jenny Sue already in a booth with drinks and answer sheets. Elana and I ordered lemonades and brownie sundaes and joined them. We caught up on each other's lives and talked about One Direction and Jenny Sue was shouting at a tv where her beloved Florida Gators were playing. A few questions in Will showed up and we squeezed a chair onto the end of our booth.

It was a 2012 year in review night and the questions were all about things that had happened in the past year. Tori impressed us all by knowing all three winners of the Voice though none of us were that surprised. Brad knew that the inventor of the barcode had died. We were mostly useless about sports except for Jenny Sue who got a name right here and there. I wasn't even ashamed that I knew that Burning Man was answer to one of the later questions. I started to laugh, grabbed the pencil from Tori's hand, and scribbled it down. For the half-way wager question the DJ told us that the category was "human accomplishments." I knew right away that it would be about Felix Baumgartners jump. There was a lot of confusion and the answer we gave didn't quite match up with the answer the DJ had but Will and I believed the DJ to be mistaken. I'm not sure how that worked out.

This particular DJ plays song clues to go along with all of the questions. Sometimes they're really far-fetched. Last spring at the competition that gave birth to this blogpost he played "Crazy In Love" when the answer was Jim Lovell. This leads us to one of my favorite moments from tonight. The DJ asked us what state was the first to legalize the possession of marijuana and played the Olympic March. Upon hearing the first few measures I shouted "O, Canada!" but Will told me point-blank that that was not the song. Then Mary and I simultaneously had a thought. Olympics = Olympia which is in Washington. I explained how I knew this by saying excitedly "I know this from Twilight!" To which Mary replied "I know this from the third grade geography bee."

Overall we did okay. But I had a lot of fun and would love to go back. Will, Elana, Jenny Sue, Tori and I were the only ones to stay to the end and we had an awkward group hug while blocking the door to the restaurant. Then Elana, Will, and I fell through the snow to where we were parked and I shouted "Shoe in my boot! Shoe in my boot!" but I meant that there was snow in it. Then Elana came back to my house and we watched Drake and Josh on Netflix, looked at pictures of child stars who grew up hot, read off lists of old Nickelodeon shows and laughed at the names. Then Elana introduced me to Danny Phantom and I completely fell in love. None of it made sense, it was so funny, and absolutely wonderful.

Now Elana has left and I am wearing new pajama pants and lounging in my bed typing this. It was a great 2nd day to the new year. I think I'll read some more of Fellowship before going to sleep. Good night!

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

How do you measure a year?

Hello! Sorry. I've been busy. Sleeping. Hiding from people. You know.

But it is January now. More specifically it is the 2nd of January in the year 2013. So far it's been pretty good. I spent New Year's Eve at Jenn's house with some friends (Hannah, Regina, Faaria, and Tori.) We played Apples to Apples and Quelf and ate food and talked and made bad jokes about the fiscal cliff and wore stupid hats and blew noise blowers and watched Pixar shorts and made fun of Kathy Griffith and tried to get Frank Sinatra songs to line up with Pit Bull's performance. It was the first New Year's I spent not with my family in the house or at a church party and it was a lot of fun. I give it a 9.

Then the next morning I woke up at 1430 and made a video of photos from 2012. Originally it was just going to be cell phone pictures but I accidentally deleted a bunch of them so I added more from my camera and from friends on facebook. I couldn't really get the song to line up right with the photos that I had but I'm pretty pleased with it regardless and that's what matters. I used "Lovely Lily" by The Remus Lupins which I listened to a lot walking to and from school in the spring and I think that it really fits how I want to remember this year. I don't want to focus on the shitty and depressed November or the stressed December or the October and September that now feels like a betrayal or the stationary July-August period.

I want to remember the trip to see my cousin Nick's children for the first time in January. I want to remember the trip to Albany with my AP gov class and the snowball fight second period the next day when we all still had tons of work due that day. I want to remember the wintery mix of poutine, Sherlock Holmes, and Nicolas Cage. I want to remember the emotional overload that was Science Olympiad in February and March and the fun we had against my better judgement with the squirrels at Niagara Falls. I want to remember the Hunger Games and how much prom preparations felt like competing in them. I want to remember Grease and the library and the Fallout shelter with Brooke and going to the creek with Allison. I want to remember the space history filled ice cream factory and meeting Dan Bursch with my dad and all those bright spring afternoons that I spent reading about manned space exploration on my deck after walking home early and doing some push-ups and sit-ups. Sun's out, gun's out! I want to remember the pair of pants I found in the bathroom during a five hour bio review session and Tori, Molly, and I sneaking around the school and leaving coffee for each other. I want to remember eating bagels on the bench by the flagpole with Kelly and just enjoying the flowers. I want to remember my last band concerts and Friendly's after them and riding and singing in Aaron's car with Peter and Will and Linda and her not being able to find the seat belt and Will and I teaching history for a day. I want to remember going to the prom with Aubrey and Manon and Axel and all of the teacher chaperons walking in to eat at the restaurant we were at. I want to remember the video I made for my senior class of our last month together. I want to remember the music picnic and finally making pretzels with Deanna and our senior trip with the lake cruise running out of French toast and so many near-deaths at the amusement park and everyone shoving their belongings into Tyler's backpack and trying to chain together on the Lazy River. I want to remember how we made noise whenever our principal tried to speak at graduation and our multiple standing ovations whenever the library or our librarian was even referred to. I want to remember party-hopping and Brianna pulling over to climb onto the hood of her car to clean the windshield and melting glowsticks over the bonfire at E.J.'s and dripping the glowing substance onto our skin. I want to remember the strange Fairy Festival with Elana and Kate and the trolls and bringing Kara back with me after orientation and being incredibly strange for 72 hours. I want to remember going to playgrounds with Kate, Elana, Dan, Chris, and Colin in August after realizing how little we had done with each other that summer. I want to remember Aaron's lakehouse and the "last-hurrah" drama club bowling expedition where we realized none of us liked bowling and we wound up at bubble tea and a playground after dark. And I want to remember the Richard Simmons workout with Lloyd and the Fancy Party with Sierra and the Harry Potter Exhibition with Kara and Alex and BeanCon and sitting in the grass with Derek and Chris and Russell getting me into wrestling and my Joe Biden birthday party and laughing in church with my sisters and Dianna and Hope and Madeline and going to Chipotle and seeing The Hobbit with my family

That's what I want to remember from this past year.

As far as 2013 goes I think it'll be really fucking weird. But so far I've loved it. I read The Fellowship of the Rings by the fire and ate soup with my parents and brother and then my sisters came home from a friends house with a huge plate of delicious cookies and we all had a good time just hanging out. Then I went to Aaron's house for "Hanksapalooza." We really like Tom Hanks movies. Aaron, E.J., Brooke and I hung out with Aaron's dad for a while and it was as good a time as it always is with those people. Then Tori arrived and we watched "A League of Their Own." Will came in just in time for the credits. I really, really liked that one. Then we watched "Philadelphia" and it was really sad but fun because Tori is going to be a lawyer and I know about not being straight. Brooke and E.J. left because they both had to go to the dentist in the morning and we watched the Swarley episode of How I Met Your Mother. Then Tori departed and it was just Will, Aaron, and I wandering around the kitchen. Aaron kept giving me citrus fruit and I kept loving him for it. Will and I decided that we were actually going to do something together when we both went back to school and my dad texted me that he was outside while I was in Aaron's arms and he was carrying me around and I was begging for Will to help me.

It was probably the best January 1st I've ever had. They say that the first day of a new year is supposed to be an indication of how the rest of the year will go for you. If that is the case, then I will be very, very grateful, lucky, and happy.